Connor’s Green Strategy

I was driving home the other night and for some reason, I just felt like a milkshake. Maybe it was the slightly warm spring-like weather, or maybe it was my body telling me I needed calcium. Knowing that every 17-year-old can ingest buckets of milkshake, I called Connor and ask him if he wanted one. Without hesitation he said, “Oh yes, and please tell me you can get me a Shamrock Shake!” Ah yes, it is that Shamrock Shake time of year.

After handing over the large green shake, and if you haven’t seen a large McDonald’s Shamrock lately is roughly the size of an NFL football, I watched quietly as he took a gigantic slurp. He inhaled deeply, closed his eyes, and said “I love it so much when you can get Shamrock Shakes. I wish they had them all year long!” He continued into further explanation, “You know, you can only get them now, from the end of February into early April. It is better than it used to be. You used to only get them in March.” I guess I didn’t become addicted to Shamrock Shakes back in my day. I was quite content to work on my vanilla shake. Intrigued, I wanted to know just how popular these shakes are with his friends. “Are you kidding?”, he exclaimed, “They are the best thing you can get. Everybody loves them. Paul has had four already and this is my first one of the season.”

Hmmm, I guess there is an officially recognized Shamrock season. It is very popular with the group he hangs with. And now I know, that he is already behind in the quest for enough green milkshake to satisfy himself until next February. So I inquire as to his strategy for the rest of the season. “Simple.”, he says, “We need to get to McDonald’s as much as possible so that I can have enough Shamrock Shakes that I get sick of them. That way, I won’t really miss them for a while and it will be easier to make it to next year.” He paused for a second, drinking his shake, and then said, “But you know, I don’t actually want to get sick from drinking them. There is a big difference between ‘getting sick of’ and ‘getting sick’.” I must admit that I understand the logic, but I think I’ll just stick with the occasional vanilla.

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2 Responses to Connor’s Green Strategy

  1. Tony Cardona says:

    Jim, I laughed out loud when reading this post. You can tell Connor that he and his friends are not alone. I have been celebrating Shamrock Shake Season for a decade now. Though I have missed my share of seasons, I have been known to drive from McDonalds to McDonalds until I found one that was not sold out of the green goodness. Shamefully, I once even raised my voice to a cashier in protest of their not having any “mix” on St. Patrick’s Day. It was not one of the finer moments in my life.

    • jimhoefflin says:

      Yes Tony, they are crazed! And I asked Connor last night what his final count was … and he believes he got about six under his belt. He always get the large, which I think are about 1,200 calories … unbelievable. I do like them too, but I only had a couple small ones this season.

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